You are some dog!

Another story about the perils of Aiden's very fertile imagination. A couple of days ago we gathered together for dinner at a really nice Burmese restaurant to celebrate Grandpa's birthday. Which by the way Aiden was quick to remind us was back in January. I guess it was his way of letting us know that we were slackers. We were joined at the dinner by Gideon, a friend of Helena's who Aiden hadn't met before. After a quick up and down look and a couple of questions, he quickly decided that Gideon was cool enough to hang out with him. He spent most of the rest of the evening hanging out with Jonathan & Ashley who are his heroes. Every now and then he'll pull a new trick on us and when we ask him, 'Who taught you that ?' He'll say 'Uncle Jonathan & Aunty Ashely taught me that. Mama and Dada teach me nothing'. We knew he absolutely adores Ashely but we had no idea that his adulation went a little beyond that until we saw Ashley's face turn pink after a little conversation with Aiden. He pulled the famous 'I showed you mine, now show me yours' trick on her. He didn't understand why Ashely couldn't return the favor after he had pulled his shirt up and showed off his nipples.

A little later on he decided that he wanted to be Orio (Cousin Ethan's dog). He then went around the table assigning dog names to everyone else. Mama was Emma, Ashley was Anokie, Jonathan was Marius and Aunty Helena was Eponine. Next in line were Gideon, Grandpa & Dada. Knowing that he had exhausted all the dog names in his vocabulory, I was very curious as to what would happen next and absolutely dreaded the thought of what name would be assigned to me. Remember that I have personal trauma from a previous episode of his imagination going wild (Dada-Under the bottom where the poop comes out). So he thought for a moment, pointed to Gideon and said 'You are some dog'. That was his way of making Gideon comfortable I guess. Then he pointed to Granpa & Dada and said the same thing. You never know what's going to fall out of his mouth next, so I was relieved that he didn't point to me and say 'You are dog poopie'. Phew!

Dada - Under the bottom, where the poop comes out

So I don't even know where to start with this post or if it's even a good idea to disclose this information, but here goes. I am in charge of Aiden's bedtime routine. You'd think that would be pretty straight forward, right ? After all, he's just a kid, how hard can it be ? Give him a bath, put the jammies on, read him a story, say night night, close the door, done. Wrong! It's a long intricate routine which he tries to prolong as much as he can. Every day he comes up with a new trick to extend his bedtime. After Mama gives him a snack feeding and leaves the room, I need to read him a story or two, make sure he's got enough water and food, sing a song or two and then on his terms he agrees to turn the light off. But that's not the end of the night, it's the beginning of the end. I have to lay with the prince until he falls asleep. And while I am laying there, he'll ask me all sorts of stuff. He usually starts by asking me 'Where is her'. And when I tell him that she's right outside getting some work done, he'll come up with all sorts of reasons why she's leaving the house. As if his Mama is gone out to party. Then he'll ask me to tell him more stories, give him water a couple of times, hold him (even though I am already holding him), pull the covers up, pull the covers down.... You get the point. Eventually he'll just exhaust himself to sleep.

Well yesterday he came up with a new trick which looks like is going to be added to the daily routine because he repeated it tonight as well. So he likes to pretend that he is different people, animals or things. We like to think that he has a very fertile imagination because he never pretends to be a boy. I mean that would not take much imagination, right? Usually it's just one personality at any given time, but the personalities switch every 2 minutes or so. But yesterday he decided that he wanted to adopt multiple personalities at the same time. So I said to him, well, you'll have to assign different body parts to each person. Little did I realize that this was going to come back to bite me in the butt (literally). So he started with Julietta (his crush), Angelina, Emma & Orio (Uncle Rick & Aunty Elena's dogs), Gianna etc who all got various body parts depending on how much he liked them. So Julietta of course got the face, Gianna got the chest and the rest got his limbs. Then he added Mama to the list and said she was his bottom. Now normally you wouldn't like to be somebody's bum, but his Mama always tells him how cute his bum is, so it's actually a good thing, right up there with the face if not better. Then he added me to the list and I was beginning to wonder which remnant of his body would be assigned to me. Without any hesitation he goes 'Dada, under the bottom, where the poop comes out'. I just could not believe what I was hearing and burst out laughing. He's probably the only person in the world who could call me an A-Hole and make me laugh :)